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Get a Life!
by Nisandeh Neta
(thanks to Anna Quindlen for the insight)

I work with people. After years of hiding behind computer screens and management room doors, I realized that I fear closeness to other people. Through contact comes the risk of disappointment, hurt, or abandonment. This made me realize that I'm actually afraid to be alive.

So I left it all behind and commenced a "career" of working with people. It is my work, and a big part of my life. My real life is everything I experience. Everything I am. I used to confuse the two, believing my life and my work were the same. Don't make the same mistake. Work is only an aspect of your life.

Your life consists of more than simply sitting at your desk, in front of your computer or commuting to and from your workplace. Your life involves more than living through your head - it is living from your heart. Life is more than your bank account - it is your essence, your source, your soul. We don't really talk about our soul anymore. It is so much easier to exchange our resumes instead of opening our heart to one another. But a resume won't fulfill you on a cold, lonely night. Or when you're sad, broke or lost.

This is my resume:

I am a good father to my daughter. She's almost 4 years old and my best teacher so far. We laugh a lot. We hug. We're moving ahead together. I am a good partner to my life partner as I removed all the reasons and needs to be with her. We laugh a lot. We hug. We're moving ahead together. I am a good friend to my friends, doing my best to support them being all that they are. We laugh a lot. We hug. We're moving ahead together. I give my 100% every moment of my life; yet I know fully well that the next moment I can give even more. I laugh about it. I hug myself. I move ahead. I take risks and learn my lessons; yet I rarely make myself wrong anymore. I laugh. I hug. I move ahead. I no longer consider myself the center of the universe. I laugh. I hug. I move ahead.

So here is what I wanted to say to you today: GET A LIFE! A real life. Not the crazy chase of the next promotion, a bigger paycheck, the larger house.

Do you really believe that you'd care so very much about those things if you have a heart attack or find a lump in your breast? Get a life in which you notice the soft snowflakes touching the bare ground before melting to be one with the earth; a life whereby you stop and watch a spider spinning its web fully trusting in the universe's abundance or the way a baby watches in wonder as the web is spun by the spider.

GET A LIFE! Pick up the phone. Send an e-mail. Write a letter. Let someone know that you care about them.

Get a life where you FULLY participate. A life that will never be boring or mundane. Observe the beauty of budding flowers in spring. Smell these flowers who share their essence for no reason at all, for nobody in particular. And realize that life is a magnificent gift, which should never be taken for granted. We have no right to do so! 

I'm learning life for many years. More years than I can remember. I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that there is no dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee that we have. I learned to look at all the good in the world and to try to make some contribution in return, because I believe in it wholly. And I tried to do that, in part, by sharing with others what I had learned.

Think of life as a terminal illness because it will teach you how to live with joy and passion and immediacy - the way it ought to be lived. And then when your day comes, you'll die with the same joy and passion looking forward to the following new adventure.

No man ever said on his deathbed, "I wish I had spent more time at the office."

In one of my workshops I bring the participants, through a guided visualization, to their deathbed - a chance to reflect back at their life. After looking at the movie of their life, they look at the values they acquired, at their successes and regrets, at the people they spend too little time with and at the people they spent too long with. They have a chance then to look at how would they like to spend their last hour and with whom.

I give them a break after this process. And it seem that suddenly everyone is totally involved in life again. People call their parents, their children, neglected friends and lovers. Suddenly there's a new sense of urgency and passion in their eyes.

GET A LIFE! And keep your eyes, ears and heart open, as life is the classroom, the lesson is continuous and the exam is at the very end.

So don't forget to laugh, to hug, and keep on moving ahead.

Enjoy...

____________________

Nisandeh Neta, trainer, success coach and healer. He is the founder of Open Circles, a center for personal-growth and leadership. He is located in the Netherlands. Call +31-20-691 61 22 or email at: info@opencircles.nl. Visit http://www.opencircles.nl to learn more about how you can make a difference, through living your dreams. Visit http://www.opencircles.nl/inspiration.htm to browse the archives of our Inspiration e-Newsletter.

 

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