|
SELECT
FROM OVER
60 CATEGORIES
- Click One To View - |
|
|
Sign Up
for our Newsletter
& Automatically be Entered
to Win Books, CDs & DVDs! |
|
|
|
|
Links
For Health, Prosperity & Joy! |
Recommended
MOVIES Now On
DVD & Video For Your Personal
SPIRITUAL GROWTH - Selected
By OfSpirit.com's Staff |
CONTACT
YOUR LOVED
ONES IN SPIRIT! Genuine
&
Legitimate Spirit Messengers
Listed
By PSYCHIC MEDIUM
RESEARCHER! (Editor's choice) |
HOW
TO BEAT DEPRESSION
Life-Changing Info for Sufferers
& Supporters (family / friends),
Written by OfSpirit.com editor,
Bob Olson - Click Here for Help ! |
BEST
PSYCHIC DIRECTORY:
Locate
Psychic & Mediums in
Your Area! With Public Reviews! |
Discover
Your Ideal
Mate,
Perfect Career,
Life's Destiny,
Health
Forecast
& Past Lives
From Recommended Astrologer,
Elizabeth Hermon (by phone)! |
Who
Were You In A
PAST LIFE? Find Out
From Regression
Expert
Nancy Canning! |
Over
60 Workshops
on Healing, Angels,
Feng
Shui, Tarot, Yoga, Psychics
& more in Andover, MA
at "Circles of Wisdom" |
THE
SECRET TO ELIMINATING
THE ROOT Of
Your Problems:
Physical
Social Or Financial,
With
Dr. Trish Whynot! |
CHANGE
YOUR LIFE NOW! Take
Your Spiritual Growth to a New
Level with the
Channeled
Guidance of
Ascended Masters
- Read about Laura Scott's Gift! |
HOW
I TRAVELED INTO
THE
SPIRIT WORLD:
Experiencing My
Life-Between- Lives During An
Amazing '
Spiritual
Regression,'
(Editor's Must-Read
Article) |
Gifted
Medium & Spirit
Artist,
Rita Berkowitz,
Can Give You
Tangible
EVIDENCE THAT AN
AFTERLIFE EXISTS - She Draws
Portraits of the Spirits She Sees! |
Crystal
Clarity: How To Expose
The HIDDEN
OBSTACLES
LURKING
In Your Subconscious
Mind! (click here to read article)! |
The
Psychic Medium Who Is
RECOMMENDED BY TOP
PSYCHIC
MEDIUMS - Find Out
Who by Reading This Article
Written by
OfSpirit.com's Editor! |
CLEAR
Your Personal,
Home And Business
ENERGY (AURA) For
Increased Joy,
Success
And Peace - Click for info! |
WHAT'S
IN YOUR FUTURE?
How One Woman Eliminated
My Skepticism About
Psychics And Future
Predictions! (Editor's article) |
The
PSYCHIC MEDIUM WHO
RAISED THE BAR, Making It
Harder For Other Mediums To
Qualify For Best Psychic
Mediums List ! (Editor's article) |
Unleash
THE POWER of INFINITE
LOVE & GRATITUDE to Heal the
True Source of Your Symptoms.
Heal Yourself; Be a Practitioner.
Click to View Video of Seminar. |
MEDITATION
BREAKTHROUGH!
A Simple, Portable Device That
Helps You Achieve A Peaceful
Meditative State? Find Out Here |
New
Site on GRIEF & THE
AFTERLIFE By the Founder
of Both OfSpirit.com &
BestPsychicMediums.com! |
The
Most Popular
Category
Of Sixty
On OfSpirit.com -
The
"Psychic & Mediums"
Page - Click To View! |
GET
IN SHAPE With Michael
Gerrish! ExercisePlus.com |
NATURAL
Healing &
Wellness Products |
WANT
TO BE INSPIRED? We at
OfSpirit.com Encourage You to
Join 'The Spiritual Cinema Circle,'
a Cool, Fun & Affordable Way to
Transform Your Life w/ Movies |
NY
Times Best-Selling Author,
Cheryl Richardson, Will Teach
You How To Successfully
BUILD A COACHING PRACTICE
(Recommended by OfSpirit.com) |
Find
Lasting Inner
Peace,
Joy & Love -
The SEDONA
Method |
Spontaneous
Travel
At Site59.com |
The
ONLY WEBSITE HOSTING
Service Used By OfSpirit.com
That's Personally Endorsed By
Bob Olson (Editor) - Read What
Bob Has to Say by Clicking Here |
Check
Out This Easy-To-Learn
COURSE on WEBSITE Success,
One that Holistic, Spiritual and
Self-Growth Business Owners
Can Understand & Implement! |
| CleanAir4Life.com |
| AROMATHERAPY
Products |
YOGA
Videos,
Props
And Clothing |
How
To Eliminate
GHOSTS,
Poltergeists &
Negative
Energy From
Your Home
Or Business! |
*
GriefAndBelief.com *
Web Resource For The
Grieving And Anyone
Interested In EVIDENCE
Of LIFE AFTER DEATH |
Spirituality
Under Surveillance:
A FORMER SKEPTIC & PRIVATE
INVESTIGATOR EXPLORES
Practitioners, Products &
Seminars in the Spiritual Field! |
|
|
|
Get
our Magazine
by Email & Be Eligible for
our Free Book Giveaway
by Clicking Here!
|
SELECT
FROM OVER
60 CATEGORIES
- Click One To View - |
| |
What Does Unconditional Love REALLY
Mean?
by Janice Lynne Lundy
We all want to be loved. If the truth be told, we long for love and will go to great lengths to have it in our lives. We also have some pretty grandiose ideas of how it should show up and what it should feel like. Notice the word "should" here. It tells us a great deal about how we REALLY feel about love.
Case in point. Just last week while sitting in a local coffee shop, I overheard a 50-something woman reveal to her friend that she was finally ready for love. "I know exactly what I want now in a relationship," she said. "I know the kind of person I want to be with and what qualities he should have. Now I just need to find him!"
It seems this eager-for-love woman had her partner "wish list" all ready to be checked off. She had created pictures in her mind of what he'd look like, be interested in, even possible occupations. I bet she even had another list of how he would demonstrate his love for her. 'Good luck,' I wished her silently, knowing that as far as pictures of love are concerned, it does no good to harbor them. In fact, they ultimately prevent us from experiencing the unconditional love we seek.
Unconditional love, the glorious, "forever after" kind of love of dreams and fairy tales, can only become real when we set it free from expectations, from all those limiting "shoulds." Unconditional love is love without conditions - love without rules, lists, even thinly disguised hopes. Simply put, if love is tied to any of these, it will surely disappoint. Our expectations of love limit it. The conditions we place upon it stop its flow.
Pitch the List
If you really want to experience great love, "Big Love" as I like to call it, get rid of any notions you might hold about how love should be. Allow love to show up on its own terms, in its own way. Remain open and flexible. Holding someone to a roster of expectations will dampen their ardor faster than a bucket of cold water.
I recall another woman with whom I conversed recently complaining about the new man in her life. They hadn't even had a formal first date before she began fuming that he wasn't affectionate or playful enough. "He's so serious!" she exclaimed. "Maybe, "I suggested, "he's just a little shy or reserved. Maybe he isn't comfortable with public displays of affection." Her response was that she was pretty sure something was wrong with him because she was being playful and affectionate and wanted him to be too. Needless to say, their relationship was doomed to fail because she began measuring him up against her ideals - her expectations of how she wanted him to be.
Embrace the Differences
Unconditional love seeks to understand rather than categorize or label. It embraces our differences and appreciates the unique way we each step to the plate of love. Not every person feels or demonstrates love in the same way. For example, some of us are huggers and kissers, showing our affection in outright ways. Others are more stoic in nature, but that doesn't mean their love is any less potent. As we attune ourselves to unconditional love, we find ourselves accepting, and even appreciating the unique way that love lives within each individual.
I remember early on in my relationship with my husband, I discovered that we each had very different ways of showing our love to one another. I was a gift giver and a card sender. He was not. I so enjoyed surprising him with little tokens of my affection and love notes. After a few months, my resentment began to build. I perceived myself to be very amorous and him not to be. One day, I tearfully asked him why he didn't reciprocate. He said that to express himself in this way was not true to his nature. He wasn't much of a card or gift giver. He helped me see that my expectations of him to express his affection in the same way I did was not a good thing. It didn't honor his uniqueness. Then I began to look at all the other ways he demonstrated his affection throughout the day. There were so many I nearly lost count! Holding my hand whenever we walked anywhere, sitting close to me on the couch while watching television, intimate talks late into the night, back rubs when I wasn't feeling well, just to name a few. Thankfully, I began to appreciate our differences as love's kaleidoscope rather than love's conditions.
My friend and mentor, Daphne Rose Kingma, author of over a dozen books about love, said it best. "Let go of love as you want it so that, finally, you can take hold of love as it is." To me, this is what unconditional love really means - to release it from expectations so it can surprise and delight us again and again. Love blooms in an atmosphere of liberty not shoulds, and when we allow our love to be free, especially free from expectations and conditions, so are we. Then, and only then, will we experience the love we have been longing for forever...
________________
Janice Lynne Lundy
is a nationally recognized speaker, interfaith Spiritual Director, and the author of
Coming Home to Ourselves: A Woman's Journey to Wholeness. This article is based on her newest book, co-authored with husband Brad,
Perfect Love: How to Find Yours and Make It Last Forever. (Heart to Heart Press; 800-831-3230;
www.soulsailing.com)
|
|
