You Can Create an Exceptional Life:

An Interview with Louise Hay and Cheryl Richardson  

Richelle Zizian, Moderator, Hay House: So let's go ahead and get started. Linda Joy would you like to start with your first question?

Linda Joy, Aspire Magazine: Sure I would love to. Louise one of the things you really stress in the book is beginning each day -- that the beginning of our day sets the tone for our lives. I'd love for you to go a little deeper into some of the things that we can do, that I can share with the readers that can really implement that, those steps in our life.

Louise Hay :          Well you know I think that the way we begin our day is really the way we begin -- we live our day and the way we live our life and not enough of us are really aware of that. So the first question I ask people is: what is the first thing you say when you wake up in the morning? and I have learned over the years that the nicest thing I can do is to just say, "Good Morning Darling, I love you, we're going to have a really great day today," and then I turn and I thank my bed for a wonderful night’s sleep and this sets a tone of joy and just looking forward to the day.

                              You know if people wake up and go, "Oh, where's the coffee," or "Oh, another day," you know that does not set a good tone for the day and I think that's a very important part of time to do it.

Linda Joy:             Well thank you.

Richelle Zizian :    Great, okay, let's go onto the next question from Melissa Olson please.

Melissa Olson, OfSpirit.com Magazine: Yes I'd like to ask Cheryl a question. I recognized in reading the book, the passion that you both have for helping people and really helping them improve their quality of life, but I wanted to ask you, Cheryl, what do you most want the reader to get from this book?

Cheryl Richardson: Let's see, you know the first thing that comes to mind for everyone listening is to experience the same kind of intimate and emotionally inspiring side of Louise that I got to experience during our time together. You know Louise has written really terrific books that talk about her life and talk about practical things people can do to improve their lives and in this book I feel like both of us had a chance to go to an even deeper level and really share some of the intimate details of our own lives and how we go about thinking good thoughts and taking consistent daily actions that make a difference, you know, that allow us to create an exceptional life.

                              So I really want them to see this beautiful side of Louise that I got to see. And then I also want people to feel inspired and moved to incorporate the changes that we suggest. You know, along with telling the story of our travels and some of the personal stories and examples that Louise and I share, we really have mapped out a plan for incorporating the changes that we're talking about and I'm hoping that people feel really inspired and moved to actually do something with it.

                              And then finally I guess I would say the feedback so far in the early groups of readers that have read the book is everybody said, "I started reading it and I couldn't put it down," or "I didn't want it to finish" and as someone who's a voracious reader as I am I really hope that the reader has the joy of that experience, you know, where they start to read the book and they feel like they're right on the journey with Louise and I and they can't wait to get back to it and they don't want it to end because I think that's a really -- that in and of itself is such a gift to the reader to give someone a book that is so engaging that they don't want to put it down.

Melissa Olson:       Well, that's exactly how I felt.

Cheryl Richardson: That is good.

Louise Hay:           This is Louise, I just came back from Australia where I was in Sydney and Melbourne and we had the I Can Do It Conferences and at each one I spoke for 15 minutes and I talked mainly about the book because it's new and people are very excited to have a new book come out and I kept -- I called it, "Conversations with Cheryl and Louise" and I said, you know you need to get a cup of tea and sit down and just join our conversations where we can show you how life can be easier, how you can make a better life and have it be really, really easy and people were buying three and four copies of the book, it just amazed me because I had to sign them all and it was marvelous, it was just the enthusiasm was just great and the response. So people, you know, were not only buying for themselves but for other people.

Cheryl Richardson: Louise I love that idea of telling people to grab a cup of tea and sit down...

Richelle Zizian :    Very good.  Let's move onto Roxanne from Friends Health Connection.

Roxanne Black, Friends Health Connection: Okay I run a non-profit organization and we work with people with health challenges and I know you've written about this but I just want to get your answer. For people living in chronic pain, for people with severe health challenges who are facing all types of life threatening diagnosis, what's your advice on how to live an exceptional life if you're dealing with on-going, especially people living with chronic pain, so what would be your...

Louise Hay :          Well no matter whether your life is pleasant or good or not or whether you are having big challenges or no challenges, the state of your mind has everything to do with how you will relate to your experiences and you can make them pleasant or you can make them unpleasant no matter what is going on. I know Cheryl has a lot to say about this.

Cheryl Richardson: Well yes, I mean I think again in the back of the book we collected all of the affirmations and the affirmations under healing, which is the first section of affirmations, Louise has some really great ones that she put in there. One in particular I remember she said to me, "I forgive myself for allowing my ____ whatever it is, anger, resentment, frustration to harm my body" which is a powerful statement. Those affirmations in the back of the book if I were somebody dealing with chronic pain I would see it as a challenge, a challenge to manage my mind knowing that without a doubt the effect of my thoughts is not only affecting my experience, like Louise is talking about, but it is absolutely affecting the state of my health and, therefore, I would be writing those affirmations every day, I would be printing them out and pasting them up around me so that I see them, I would buy some dry eraser markers so that I can actually write them on windows and mirrors around me which are things that I do and Louise does.

                              You know, having these all around us, especially with chronic pain I would see it as a challenge because here's the thing Roxanne, I have tremendous empathy for people who are faced with any kind of a chronic problem, I really do and sometimes when someone's faced with a chronic problem it’s as though, let me think about the appropriate way to say this, it's as though some part of them feels like it has permission to stay immersed in the difficulties of it instead of being more focused on what can be done about it.

                              And, you know, here's the thing, we now know from brain science that neuro pathways are created based on what we say to ourselves and what we do over and over and over again. So if you think about chronic pain, it's an invitation to chronically feel -- not feel good in the body, to feel the pain, to be telling ourselves this sucks, I can't -- like all kinds of negative messages, which are creating neuro pathways.

                              So in the beginning, we need to create new, better serving neuro pathways by using these affirmations, by surrounding ourselves with people who are positive and are not going to get pulled into the drama or pulled into the chronic state of resentment that can go with pain and by doing that you'll see that you'll naturally start to shift.

                              I experienced that profoundly within probably the first two chapters of the book and I wrote about it that after consistently practicing what Louise and I were talking about I saw the shift begin to occur where my automatic response to a difficult situation was a positive intervening response instead of the old negative response. So chronic pain is just an invitation, it's a gift to really learn how to manage your mind because when you do that it's going to affect all areas of your life, not just your body.

Roxanne Black:     So when Louise just said, "We could look at situations as pleasant or unpleasant."

Cheryl Richardson: Yes.

Roxanne Black:     Are you saying in a way to look at chronic pain, I don't know if you could look at it as a pleasant experience.

Louise Hay:            No, what you could do is not look at it as a miserable experience.

Roxanne Black:     And look at it as an invitation, sort of.

Louise Hay:            I think that intensifies the pain, the more unhappy you are, the more miserable you are, the more you're going to suffer and I think you can learn to have much more pleasant thoughts moving through our minds and that will help ease the situation.

Cheryl Richardson: I think that's a really important point what Louise just said is that if you focus on it being miserable, it physically will intensify the pain. If anyone of us on this phone were feeling nauseous and I asked you to really focus on the nausea, really focus on how horrible it feels to feel sick to your stomach, I can pretty much guarantee you you'd get even more nauseous. And if we stayed with it, you'd probably throw-up.

                              So we know that on the other hand if you were feeling nauseous and I invited you to start thinking peaceful, calming thoughts, to love your stomach, to sit back and breathe and imagine life as beautiful or imagine life as, you know, a sane and settled place, you'd actually start to feel better. We know that our thinking can absolutely affect the physical body.

                              So what Louise is saying is important at the very least to thoughts that are not emphasizing how miserable it feels to be in chronic pain.

Roxanne Black:     That's a great answer, thank you.

Richelle Zizian:      Very good.  Okay so let's go back up top with second question from Linda Joy.

Linda Joy:              Louise one thing I noticed through the story, for both of you actually...

Louise Hay:            Yes.

Linda Joy:              ...so I'd love for both of you to answer, is through your journey, Louise, over the years, the one thing I notice is that you always have this sense of trust, even before you were as far along on the journey as you are now. Was that something innate in you, because you had a sense of always allowing and accepting and I see that thread throughout your whole life? And then with Cheryl, as you shared of learning to trust and let go and not be the Lone Ranger, so for some of us, I'm in your place Cheryl, where I'm still learning to not be the Lone Ranger, so the question is, is it something we have to learn and experience or like Louise, who it seems that she was born with it.

Louise Hay :          No, I wasn't born with it but I had a really rotten childhood and I survived it and after I got out of that it's like, you know, I could survive anything and I just trusted -- life got me out of that situation and life has been taking care of me one way or another ever since. And the more I trusted the more extraordinary things happen. I came home recently and I opened the door and the alarm went off and I didn't know what to do and I walked out on the street for a moment thinking, "What am I going to do, what am I going to do, please help me," and the next thing I know a woman comes, a neighbor from across the street and said, "Is that your door, you know, are you making that noise," and the next thing I know she has her person that put in her alarm system come and visit me and the whole thing was over in 20 minutes. And I said, "Boy, life really loves me, life loves me," you know, more proof.

Linda Joy:             Wonderful.

Cheryl Richardson: Yes and I think, you know, I just want to just echo what Louise said, I think we're all learning and that learning to trust life really can only happen through experience. It's been something that's been important to me right, you know, very early on in my own growth, in my mid-20's, when I was introduced to the work by Emmet Fox, you know, a friend of mine gave me "Sermon on the Mount" which was about the metaphysical teachings of Jesus and I, you know, fortunately I had an open mind and it was, you know, then when we -- I began to read about doing treatments and trusting that our thinking is influencing our lives and, you know, sometimes I think that desperation is a gift in that when we're faced with very difficult life circumstances we'll get on the bandwagon quicker and the times where I've been really challenged in my life have really forced me to reach out to life, to a power greater than me in the hopes that I will be supported and then I look for that support.

                              And the more evidence you get the more you believe it and I think its true having spent as much time as I have with Louise. I mean I admire and respect the trust that she has and I'm inspired by it and I am absolutely more trusting today than I was a year ago when we started on this book and yet there are times that I think, and Louise you can speak to this as well, I mean there are times where something that's really difficult is going on or I'm really frightened about something and I find myself questioning that trust or forgetting to have that faith or that trust and it's then that I'm -- I might pick-up the phone and call Louise and she'll remind me or, you know, I'll call another dear friend of mine who's on the same journey and I'll get the reminder and I think that's how, you know, if we -- when we can't find the faith, hopefully we can find a friend and when we find a friend then we're reminded that we're never alone.

Louise Hay :          But, you know, I do the same thing, something happens and I go, "Oh my goodness and ba, ba, ba," but I catch myself as soon as possible and I start soothing myself. I don't try to do anything about the situation but I soothe myself, you know, “all is well”, “it's okay”, “it's going to work out”, “everything's fine”, “life loves me” and I soothe myself and that way I can bring more positive energy into the situation and then I let life take over and life fix it.

Cheryl Richardson: Don't you feel, Louise, like we've been doing that even more since we've been working on this book?

Louise Hay :          Oh, absolutely, we remind each other constantly to stay on the pathway. You know we all get off the pathway. It's about how fast can you get back on.

Cheryl Richardson: Amen, sister. That's really important, I mean please underscore, bold and italicize that line, we all get off the pathway, it's all about how quickly you get back on.

Richelle Zizian :    I like that, great. Melissa from OfSpirit.com, would you like to ask your second question?

Melissa Olson:       Sure. I could definitely pick-up on that intimacy that you spoke about Cheryl. When I was reading the book, I could feel the intimacy of the time that you spent together writing the book and I actually want to ask both of you this question. I wondered were either of you changed by this experience and if so how. I know Cheryl you did touch on that a little bit but I didn't know if you had anything else to add about that.

Cheryl Richardson: Yes, I mean I do not let myself get away with lounging in negative thoughts anywhere near as much as I used to. I'm far more vigilant about the power of my mind to affect the course of my life.

Louise Hay :          Well I think one of the things we've both learned from this is to really realize that the big thing is not to beat yourself up when you make a mistake.

Cheryl Richardson: Yes.

Louise Hay :          It's not, "Oh, I'm terrible, I did it again." No, no, no, "Okay I caught it, that's something I don't want to do. I know that if I think these thoughts instead, I will be much more comfortable, and I'll bring much better experiences into my life." I think that we all need to be our own cheerleader for whatever's going on in life. We really want to be there for ourselves, we're terrific, we're wonderful, look in the mirror in the morning and say, "Darling I love you, you’re fantastic."

Cheryl Richardson: Yes I've got to say Melissa; I do that a lot more. I now have a mirror on my desk in my office ever since finding Louise's on her desk and I look in it all the time and I'm always giving myself positive messages and I have little notes written on the windows in my bathroom and the windows in my office and, you know, one of the ways that I also feel very profoundly changed from my experience in writing the book with Louise is I am a lot more patient with the growth process. I recognize, you know, one of the wisdom -- the wisdom of age, the fact that Louise has been around longer than I have, I can see that she can be so patient and loving with herself and with others and trusting that things are going to unfold and happen when they're supposed to, not when we want them to.

                              Louise I remember recently you and I were talking about a client of mine who was struggling with something she really wanted in her life and you said to me, and I said to you, "You know, what kind of affirmations would you recommend for somebody let's say who, who really wants to get married, wants to find a mate and because this person is really anxious to find a mate," and I remember you said to me, "You know the affirmation I would use is not that I find a mate but that I trust life to bring me the perfect mate in the perfect time." And it's such a beautiful example of how I now recognize that the things that I impulsively really wanted to have happen before I wrote this book, I now rest that impulsiveness and trust that life will allow it to unfold a) as it's supposed to and b) when it's supposed to and that's a very -- that's a much more peaceful way to live.

Louise Hay :          You know I think we could have… instead of calling the book "You Can Create an Exceptional Life," we could have said, "How You Can   Be More Comfortable In Your Daily Living." Because when you're comfortable in daily living, you know, you have a better outlook on life.

Cheryl Richardson: Sure.

Louise Hay :          And again better experiences will come to you.

Melissa Olson:       Thank you.

Louise Hay :          You're welcome.

Richelle Zizian:     Okay is – Roxanne -- are you ready for your second question?

Roxanne Black:     Yes. I talked to a lot of people who've been through all types of challenges, especially physical health challenges, but sometimes emotional health challenges, and all of us on the phone, so many of us, have been reading these books and doing a lot of these exercises for many years. If there was someone you could talk to who picked-up this new book who has never before read a book like this or has never tried any of these exercises, people who have been through negativity, like you said Louise you had a very difficult childhood, so someone who may have had a very difficult childhood with a lot of reinforcement of negative beliefs about themselves, who is fearful, who never questioned, I guess, those negative -- that negative identify, never before questioned it and is fearful maybe even questioning it who wants to begin self-help, what would you say...

Louise Hay :          Well I see this as a perfect book for a beginner because it's simple and easy and the steps are really simple and easy and if people will just even do one step in the book things will start to shift inside of them.

Richelle Zizian :    Did one more person have a follow-up.

Donna Strong, Awareness Magazine: I wanted to ask if you have any final comments, the wisdom of not knowing and yet taking a step seems like two goals for the precarious feel for our times.

Louise Hay :          Yes.

Cheryl Richardson: So taking a step without knowing the end result is the only way we develop faith and it’s not only a practice that allows us to develop faith, but it's a practice that connects us with a power greater than us, it's the practice that really helps us to know beyond a shadow of a doubt in the very debts of our being that life loves you and that life only has your best interest at heart and that as human beings we're the only ones that get in the way of that and when we align ourselves by thinking good thoughts, taking good actions, you know, taking the actions that make us feel good and being willing to act without knowing the end result we get all the evidence we need.

Donna Strong:       Beautiful.

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The above interview is the partial transcript of a tele-interview produced by Hay House on August 10, 2011.

Louise Hay, the author of the international bestseller You Can Heal Your Life, is a metaphysical lecturer and teacher with more than 50 million books sold worldwide. She has appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show and many other TV and radio programs both in the U.S. and abroad.
Websites: www.LouiseHay.com® and www.HealYourLife.com®  Facebook page: www.Facebook.com/LouiseLHay

Cheryl Richardson is the New York Times best-selling author of numerous books. Her work has been covered widely on national television, including The Oprah Winfrey Show, the Today Show, and Good Morning America. She leads large web communities at www.CherylRichardson.com and www.Facebook.com/CherylRichardson, which are dedicated to helping people around the world improve their quality of life.