Learning How
To Fall ... You Have To Learn To Fall Before You Can Ride With Confidence!
by Edward Toupin
About a month ago, I was hit by a car while riding my motorcycle.
The car side-swiped me and took off. My bike bounced off the car,
shot out from under me, and I rolled under the car. Amazingly
enough, I stood up, picked up my bike, and got to the side of the street
without any problems. All I had was a small bit of road rash on my
elbow. I was lucky!
However, I'm not writing this to acquire oohs and ahhs, but to discuss one
important lesson I learned from this incident that applies very well to
life in general. The basic lesson I learned here was that, now that
I am confident in hitting the ground and surviving, I have actually become
a much better rider. Of course, they do say that there are only two
types of motorcycle riders --- those who have gone down, and those who
have not.
--- Change and Balance ---
At the beginning of many of my coaching sessions, my clients ask me why
things fall apart, out of the blue, once they get moving along in their
lives. Believe it or not, there is an answer. It has to do
with balance, lessons, and traversing new and unknown paths. In all
cases, the only time we encounter challenges is when we decide to move
forward toward a new goal. In our movement, we throw our environment
into an imbalance causing a chain reaction of events around us to push
balance back into the situation.
We usually see this surge for balance as a problem, challenge, or issue
and then back off to fall back into the safety of the original situation.
But, realize, that such surges are merely in response to your own desire
to change. When you initiate change, your environment creates an
equal and opposite force against change. It is called
"nature".
--- Crash and Burn ---
Once we are able to overcome the initial inertia of change and move
forward, we inevitably encounter challenges that will cause us to stumble
and fall. Such challenges are not in place to cause us to quit, but
are there to wake us up and make us realize that we can endure much more
than we thought we could and still continue along our path. Falling
enables us to see our own character and abilities to prepare us for the
future challenges. This is a stair-step approach to bettering
ourselves and becoming stronger in our resolve.
However, the important part of falling is that you learn how far you have
to go to hit the ground. In many cases, we fear falling because it's
going to hurt. Indeed, wiping out at 50mph is painful, but
survivable. But, once you know what it feels like and can maintain
your wits when you hit the ground, getting up and doing it again is easy
because you know that you will survive. In the end, you are better
able to pursue the ultimate goal because you are no longer afraid of
falling, or failing.
--- What's next? ---
I once heard the saying, "if you fall on your face, at least you were
moving forward." It's an interesting statement because, the
only way to fall forward is if you have forward momentum when you fell.
It's an excellent view to accept when moving toward a goal as it can help
make the potential falls easier to bear. This, because, inevitably,
we will fall. But, so many times we get caught up in the negative
aspects of failure, or falling. Instead, view it as a wake-up call
or a way to desensitize yourself so that you can focus on your goal.
In this way, future falls won't be so dramatic and our fear of falling
won't get in the way of achieving our desires.
__________________
Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, and
technical writer living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors
books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success
through life organization and fulfillment. For more information, e-mail
Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or
visit his sites at http://www.toupin.com
or http://www.make-life-great.com.