For those of us whose physical needs for food have been overshadowed by our desire for a smaller body size, we have probably ignored our body's signals, counting on a diet, rather than our body's wisdom or our personal preferences, to tell us what to eat. When we eat from the "outside" instead of the "inside," it is normal to rebel by eating formally "forbidden foods." To change our relationship with food, we need to develop what Tribole and Resch describe in their excellent book with the same title, Intuitive Eating. Intuitive eaters make food choices without feeling guilt; they honor their hunger, respect their fullness and enjoy the pleasures of eating. Alongside the plethora of diet books are a growing number of excellent books describing this approach by Geneen Roth, Hirschmann and Munter and Susie Orbach, among others.

If you'd like to change your relationship with food, you might want to experiment with the following suggestion:

When you think about eating, ask yourself if you're physically or emotionally hungry. If you're not sure, drink some water, as you may be dehydrated. Take a few slow deep breaths, as fatigue and stress often masquerade as hunger. If you realize you're not physically hungry, ask yourself what triggered your desire for food. Was it a beckoner? (a habitual response to, say, passing a bakery) Perhaps an uncomfortable thought or feeling prompted the automatic reaction of wanting food to distract you. Try going inside and allowing the awareness to surface. Journaling may help. Make a list of some tools you can use to cope with these feelings — exercise, meditation, calling a friend, being in nature, taking a relaxing bath....

When you eat, eat with awareness and enjoyment. If you're eating while doing another activity, you will miss the "cephalic phase of ingestion." As Marc David, nutrition consultant and author of Nourishing Wisdom says, "You have to be there when you eat. The belly is full but the mouth is hungry." The brain experiences hunger if it hasn't experienced the taste, pleasure, aroma and satisfaction from the food. If you're eating until the TV show breaks for a commercial or you've finished the chapter, you will miss the body's message that you've had enough food and you may overeat. To feel the satisfaction from the food, it is important to be relaxed and aware. The French, who eat foods with a relatively high fat content, tend to be thin, partly due to genetics and largely because they dine rather than eat on the run. Careful attention is paid to the quality of the food, its preparation and appearance, and the ambiance in which it is eaten. Since food is eaten with great awareness and pleasure, they are satisfied with smaller portions.

Experiment with eating for energy. After all, in addition to tasting good and satisfying us on many levels, food is fuel for the body. Marc David describes "eating to the point of energy" as that point where we feel more energy than before we ate. If we eat past this point, we will feel sluggish and actually lose energy. It is important to make sure we're breathing fully as we eat, bringing oxygen to the body with which to digest the food.

Conscious eating requires commitment and awareness. Cultivate a sense of gratitude for the food. Each time we remember to eat with awareness, we come home to that place of inner peace. As we learn to nourish our bodies, we find that we are spiritually nourished as well.

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Barbara L. Holtzman, MSW, LICSW is a psychotherapist, hypnotherapist and lifestyle coach in Providence and Wakefield RI and is the author of Conscious Eating, Conscious Living; A Practical Guide to Making Peace with Food & Your Body. Barbara has found her own natural body weight through her “Making Peace with Food & Your Body” approach, which she presents at colleges, hospitals, women’s expos, and wellness centers and through magazines and newspaper articles. 

To reach Barbara directly about her workshop schedule, therapy or coaching practice, e-mail barbaraholtzman@cox.net or call her at 401-789-0777. Her website is www.makingpeacewithfoodandyourbody.com.